Growing up

There is something so beautiful and poetic about watching your child playing from afar. Maybe it's that everything you see them do they are doing on their own with no input or influence from you... Maybe it's that you see the light in their eyes of discovery and imagination... Or maybe it's that we literally see them growing up in front of our eyes, no longer an innocent baby who needs your constant support but a growing individual who makes their own decisions. There is a definite bitter sweet that fills my heart as I see this little person grow into his own, with his own personality and capabilities that no longer need me like before.

Despite what seems to be a constant state of sleep deprivation I feel like I've come to truly enjoy the little moments when I'm still needed. Whether it's holding a little hand going down the stairs, tucking him in (yet again), or carrying him around, I can't help but feel the time fly by us. It's so easy to get caught up in daily chores that we forget about these little moments that matter most... And that I'll miss the most as he grows up too fast.

Germ warfare

Long gone are the times when I can wallow in my own self misery when sick. Welcome to motherhood. Motherhood with 2 children meaning quarantines, splitting up the kids so that the other has a chance of staying well, and hunkering down until the damned virus has vacated (hopefully before everyone goes crazy from the plague procedure). There is a true art to balancing the sanity of all... mom because she's caring for the infected, worrying about each new symptom, hoping that she's containing the spread (and not becoming a new vessel for transmission), and sadness for not being able to kiss or hold the babe (for fear of being contagious before being symptomatic). While mom making hourly runs in and out of quarantine for juice, Popsicles, and medicine, dad is feeding the babe...yet again, hoping that she'll take anything by mouth but inevitably ends up tubing the majority of the meal. Day in and day out while hoping that the illness stays upstairs he keeps on the schedule, crossing fingers at each feed that this one will stay down, that all the effort won't be for nothing and that the nutrition will stay down. In the meantime, flu-boy doesn't understand why he's sick, why he's stuck upstairs and can't play with sister, and when this will all end. And our poor little one is frustrated and upset when she sees mom go back and forth throughout the day yet never getting close enough to touch, kiss, or hold her.....

Oh the joys of the flu.